Even though you are an independent woman it is still okay to accept help from others.
The whole idea of asking for help from others has been a big deal for me as an independent woman. I have always been very independent and the idea for me to ask for help has been crippling. This is something I had to learn to get over. I realized when I was able to not only ask for help but also accept help, my life changed. It is very important in relationships that you not only accept help but also ask when needed.
As a Mom, you would generally think asking for help is synonymous with motherhood. Well, this wasn’t true for me. When my children were young, it was my worst nightmare for me to ask for help. For me, it made me feel more vulnerable and that was an emotion that I didn’t embrace very well. If something had to be done, I just did it. My motto at that time was, “I got to do, what I got to do”. This did not leave room for me asking for help. At that time in my life, being vulnerable was not a characteristic I wanted to embrace.
As I have matured, I began to consider what it was about vulnerability I didn’t like. I immediately realized that is when I am out of the feeling of being in control. Being in control was always what I needed to feel comfortable. My need to be in control of my circumstances and situations would not allow me to ask for help. Now I no longer need that type of control over circumstances. As an independent woman I am learning to accept help.
Being an independent woman who accepts help from others has it benefits.
The benefits of being open to help:
- allows me to enable others to fulfill a purpose
- allows me to develop a feeling of trust
- allows me to be comfortable with the unknown
- allows me to learn from others
Each benefit serves its own purpose in allowing me to connect more with others. Everyone loves feeling needed. I know for me, when I am able to help others it makes me feel good about myself.
Living as an independent woman who accepts help will allow others to fulfill a purpose in my life. It is understandable that not everyone is good at everything. There are also times when you may feel overwhelmed with responsibility. These are the times when you ask for help and others can have an input into your situation. This is especially useful when you take on the task of learning a new skill or obtaining a new goal. You need to always remain coachable. By remaining coachable you are allowing others to give you new information and teach you new skills.
Having a trust in others can be difficult as an independent woman accepting help. Whenever you ask for help from others, you are trusting in them to handle the task at hand. The task doesn’t have to be difficult. It can be as small as picking you up from somewhere to making repairs or as a mom to babysit. I know it makes me feel great when I can pick up the phone with a call for help and the person I call shows up. It is a feeling of relief. Developing trust has been a big thing for me as an independent woman accepting help.
Another big development in the life of an independent woman who accepts help is being comfortable with the unknown. You may wonder, what is unknown about asking for help from others. Well, first of all, you don’t know whether the help you asked for will be given. Secondly, the moment you request for help, you are no longer in control of that particular situation. You must be okay with that. To be totally honest, for a long time I wasn’t. It has taken me awhile to be okay with the unknown. There are times when the unknown makes me nervous but I have promised myself to not stop asking for help because of it.
The greatest gift of asking for help as an independent woman is the possibility of learning from others. When you ask for help, hopefully you are asking someone who is capable of the task at hand. During your times of feeling overwhelmed is the time to request for extra help. As a Mom, we take on everything that is needed as it relates to our family. This is not always a great idea. It is understood, if you don’t have a lot of help around you. But, then again, how would you know what type of help is available if you don’t ask.
The bottom line is, there is absolutely nothing wrong with an independent woman accepting help from others.
Being independent doesn’t have to mean isolation. It only means you are responsible without waiting on others to do what you have decided to do for yourself. Embrace your independence. But don’t neglect the help of others when you are in need.